Do you let your kids cuss?

[bigNerd]

I love profanity. I wouldn't want to live without it, I think I would just give up speaking altogether.

Anyway, my confession is that I let my kids cuss and I even think it's funny. I have them well trained not to cuss around people who are bothered by it (school, grandparents, their dad). Anyway, I have been using profanity joyfully since I was 6 and my otherwise very strict (I'm strict too) parents never cared.

Any thoughts?

[courey]

ermm.... Nope. Not cool, imo.

[Clementine]

language can be used as a means of respect or disrespect.
curse words are generally disrespectful. i feel children need to be taught more meaningful and intelligent ways to communicate.
cursing does have its place, and i am guilty of it myself. however, i think children should be taught how to communicate properly and respectfully.

[bigNerd]

I'd let my kids cuss.

I would want them to understand their first amendment and enjoy - in the right company, of course.

When I was a wee one, momma didn't let me cuss. Let alone tell my brother to "shut up". I wasn't even allowed to be rude and look how dysfunctional I am!

*cusscussrudecusscuss*

Let your kids cuss young or they'll turn out like me.
:) Well, my parents did let me cuss and I still love it! I'm never rude, though.

I just think it's funny to hear people's different opinions about this. I live in a land of soccer moms and minvans, and most of my neighbors would shit if one of their kids used a bad word, but they don't do anything when their kids use a rude or whiney tone or argue openly with their parents, etc. I think it's funny because I'm the opposite. My kids are allowed to say anything they want (including disagreeing with me) but they can't be disrespectful.

[Dita]

I wouldn't freak out if Carson said a bad word, but I wouldn't allow him to do it. He needs to learn the difference between nice and not so nice words. Once in Target (and because of a song my sister let him listen to!), he was singing out loud where others could hear, "move bitch! Get out the way!" I could've DIED at the looks I was given. Anyhow, it just didn't sound RIGHT coming out of his mouth. I'm sure once he's 16 or 17, I may let the word "ass" slip through every now and then, but as of right now, since he can't hold an intelligent conversation with an adult, he doesn't need to use words like one.

[PotatoFace]

Personally I think it is distasteful for parents to allow that. My personal opinion, soI'm not flaming you. Everyone has their own parenting ways. But, what is the need? When they are 16-17 It gets a little better, but why is it needed? Its not cute, its disrespectful. When your child does say it, what contex is it in? Are they using it around adults in a disrespectful way? I mean, saying "Thats a fucking awesome stero system" around your grandmother when you are 8 is just not right.

Im not a conservative person in anyway, but respect and tact are very valuble things to learn, and they need to be learned early.

[Adam]

I was shocked when my neighbor started cursing like a sailor around her kids, but they know not to use bad words. I try not to curse around them but I have a bit of a potty mouth so it's hard. It's good to know that they know not to use those words though.

[ej]

I don't know why, but it ives me a start every time I hear a profanity coming out of a child's mouth. I have certainly tempered my language around my kids, because I think that there are far better ways to express yourself than through profanity. Swearing's nothing but filler most of the time -- it's easy to find something else to say.

[MILCMAID]

When I was about 9 or 10 I asked my mom why I couldn't curse... and she said she didn't care. There were of course certain terms (like the 'F' word) that I knew better to say in front of her, but almost everything else was no big deal. It was never a big thrill for me because of it, and I rarely curse these days. Only when I get really really mad!!

I have friends on the other hand who's parents punished them for the slightest slip up. My neighbor used to punish her high school daughter for saying things "sucked". She cursed like a sailor when her mom wasn't around, of course! And she still does it today.

[angeles]

When my son curses I get the soap out. It certainly has detered his potty mouth :)

-angeles (xo)

[Sheri]

I was allowed to swear at a very young age, and now I have the mouth of a truck driver.

I will not allow my daughter to swear. Not until she is a teenager, 17 or 18, and as long as it is not directed torwards anyone. Especialyl me.

:c

[courey]

I think the notion that if your parents let you cuss then you're less likely to do so as an adult is kind of rediculous; our topic creator here states to the contrary herself. My own mom allowed me to start cussing when I was 12 or so. I was allowed to pick one word to say. I really wish she had just handed me a dictionary and told me that if I could cuss intelligently, then I wouldn't need to say "shit", figuratively or literally. ;)

[1500]

Absolutely not! It is not appropriate for kids to talk that way. I don't even like it when adults talk that way. I admit to swearing on occasion, but I do my best not to. I think it's trashy and unneccessary. There are plenty of other words out there to use, so use them!

[Ramba]

i never let my kids cuss...and now that they're bigger than me, the think it's their right. my bf has the mouth of a sailor, and so do his kids..so, now it's not a simple thing. *sigh* i still scold them when they do it, but it's not as effective as it would have been.

[syvvie]

Swearing just isn't a big deal to me. It certainly isn't something I would punish for or make an issue. They're just words, and as long as you recognize that there's a time and place where those words are acceptable, and you aren't using them in the grocery store or in front of Gramma, I don't think it really matters. Sylvia does NOT cuss, but really, it's more her decision than mine. I don't tell her "You aren't allowed to say that", I tell her "I would rather you didn't." She would tell you herself that those are 'adult words' and she doesn't use them because she isn't an adult.

I don't like to hear cussing coming from children, but I wouldn't raise a ruckus about it, either. There are so many other things I find way more inappropriate. Seeing a 10 year old with "Hottie" spelled out across the ass of her pants disturbs me WAY more than hearing a kid say "shit".

But that's just me. ;)

[RealityTVjunkie]

I am surprised that so many parents don't care about their kids language. I am a pretty laid back person, but I think teaching a little kid bad words, only encourages them to be disrespectful. I cant even imagine what my parents would have done if we had said inapprorpriate stuff instead of them. Definitely would have had a bar of soap in my mouth...

[monstersmom]

I do curse some, but some words like the "f" word and the "GD" word make me physically cringe. I hardly ever curse around my kids and they are not allowed to say curse words, not even crap or piss. I don't even let them watch movies with lots of language. The times that they have said a curse word, I didn't flip out on them, I just reminded them that those words are not appropriate to use and let it go. To each his own I guess, but it makes people assume that the parents and children are ignorant or trashy.

[mellissima]

My daughter knows she's not allowed to curse. However, if she does slip and say a cuss word around me I don't make it a big production, just give her "the look". If you come down too heavy they will just want to do it more and behind your back. This way she realizes it's not that wonderful to say cuss words.

[Autumn]

Well, my daughter isn't allowed to cuss, but she knows all the words. :)

She's slipped up now and then and said a word or two that she shouldn't. And she gets a talkin' to about it when it happens. Most recently, she had a couple of friends over and I heard her say "shit". Friends had to go home, and she got a scolding.

[The March Hare]

Yeah, around the time that I was abused(8-12 years old), I wasn't able to communicate properly as I wasn't quite sure how to word how I felt about the whole situation or exactly what had happened to me(my grandparents ran a Christian cult and I was sexually abused by my grandmother). I was quite intelligent, but being vocal.. I couldn't seem to fathom what had happened during those years or even be able to put them into words. So I started self-injuring. Imagine my parents' surprise when I went to different hospitals for self-injury and sexual abuse victims and the harshest of curse words flew from my mouth left and right! My therapists assured them that it was normal for a person who used her body as a tool of communicating and now having to relearn how to verbally express herself. They weren't comfortable with their kid swearing like a sailor, but it passed as I learned new coping mechanisms and capabilities of expressing my feelings and situations I was in.

That was about the only time my parents let me curse as a kid(I'm 20 and they really don't like it much now considering its disrespectful!), but it was in understanding circumstances.

[DuracellBunny]

My children will not cuss at me and I will not cuss at them, this is for me a sign that our relationship has more respect than than. I love it when some one picks a verbal fight with you and they are cussing away and shouting and you very calmly and politly put them in their place. Everyone sees the calm non swearer as the winner.

I can cuss and occasionally I do and it feels good, because I have used it at the right time rather than all the time. It is important for children to learn to express their feelings without cussing before they start cussing.

[Cheri]

I let my kids cuss. Maybe I should explain that they aren't kids anymore. :D

[JulieS911]

My children are 17, 13 and 9 and I don't let them use foul language at home - even though I know they probably do with their mates.

I tell my youngest that I know that she knows all the naughty words - they hear them all around - even on Live8 in the middle of the afternoon people swore - but the clever thing to do is to know them and to choose not to use them. We talk often about being respectful and I will ground all of them if I hear anything I don't like - even my eldest.

I think that now days children get away with too much and they lose respect for other people - it is up to us to make sure that they know what is appropriate and what isn't.

[garoux]

My parents didn't let me cuss in front of them, but I started cussing when I was about 11 years old. I started cussing in front of them when I hit about 16. I didn't use the f-word in front of my mom until I was 20 and even then it was rare.

I won't allow my daughter to cuss in front of my until she's in her later teens. I want her to be able to speak without every other word being "goddamn" or "fuckin'" which is how I hear a lot of people talking. It drives me nuts.

[laneblue]

When my oldest son was young I "banned" swearing. I watched my language very carefully around my kids. My oldest was about 8 and his brother 4. Do you know what happens when a group of them get together....they swear. I got over it, and just made sure they knew not to swear around teachers, grandpa, or at me. They both are wonderful boys now who swear occasionally but never disrepectfully. Now I can stub my toe and yell SHHIIITTT. Without worrying they will walk around in public repeating it over and over again.

[entropy]

Man, my momma still has to comment if I cuss now. :r


mine too! and i wasn't allowed to say fart! when i'm feeling playful, i'll start sing "fart fart fart" to her. there is this children's book called "walter the farting dog". I"m going to buy it for her as a gag christmas gift and write on the inside "so you can share the joys of reading with your grandchild".

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/1583940537/qid=1122168504/sr=8-1/ref=pd_bbs_1/104-8588741-7820706?v=glance&s=books&n=507846

[LavenderSession]

My hubby thinks cussing is no big deal and neither do I. His daddy always told him that if he's doing something productive, swearing was okay. My parents never let us say bad words. Shut up, hate, sucks, friggin, freakin, and all the others were considered "bad" words. I said shit around my grandmother one time and she put soap in my mouth (i was seven at the time). I swear like a sailor now. It may be trashy, but I've been doing it for forever.

Anyway, I have a 2 year old and both my husband and I have such a hard time censoring ourselves. She repeats a lot of what we say. I don't really like hearing such bad words come out of such a beautiful child so I've told her that those words are not okay for her to say and even told her that mommy and daddy shouldn't say those words either. It's a bad habit to break. It's like smoking. Do they make a patch for this?

[dormilona]

walter the farting dog is one of the greatest kids books ever. i love the gas power at the end... *thoroughly enjoys that accidental pun*

[Cheri]

My mom won't let me tell her shut up. Even joking. I have to say hush. And Im 42. Seriously.........and this is no put down to anyone here........I hate to hear women cuss. I try not to cuss out in public. You can tell how bad I am feeling by counting how many times I say the "f" word. My kids can cuss but they don't cuss around me. I told my boys they could get as big as Dan (6'4" and 300 lbs.) but they will never be bigger than me.

[honeybell]

I'm not a mom (yet) but I have to say, I'm not too keen on children cussing. I cuss sometimes, so I'm the pot calling the kettle black here.

More or less, I feel one should be more creative with their language. Everyone can drop an F-bomb, therefore I feel cussing is trite. I want my children to grow up learning to think about the words that come out of their mouths. Cussing is an easy out to all of that.

One night (and this is just a story about a kid who cussed, no real point) my boyfriend and I were coming home after having been out with friends. As we were walking into our apartment building, a Mom, Dad, and Son were leaving the building. The Son was about four. He looks up and says very loudly, "What the fuck, mommie?" The parents never flinched.

Much Love!

[WeAreLegion]

I discourage it but I don't get bent out of shape if one of them cusses. My daughter (8) knows most of them and did use them when she was 6 or so. We discouraged it but didn't make a big deal out of it and she hasn't cussed at all in a long time. My son (12) tends say them more than anyone in the house but he's amusingly self-policing. He gets wide eyed and claps his hands over his mouth.

If all he ever does is drop the occasional "F" bomb then I've got nothing to worry about.

[Fray]

My mum wouldn't even let me say "bliming" or "bloody" or "crap".

I now tell my dad off when he curses. Of course I do swear myself sometimes but because I teach I try really hard not to!