View Full Version : when did you know you didn't want children?
hollerskates
03-13-2006, 08:09 PM
i've been taking care of children in some form since i was 12-13 years old. i always thought i wanted kids. i grew up in a small town. babysat all the kids at church. i was good at it. kids were drawn to me. it made me feel good about myself. i majored in elem ed/english lit in college. really thought i wanted to be a teacher. i honestly don't remember having such negative feelings toward the idea of having children/caring for children until i worked in schools. the dynamic between parents/children/teachers. well, if it didn't deter me from wanting children, it at least changed my mind about teaching. but i think the major turning point for me has been in the last 2 years working for the family i'm currently employed with.
i started to write all the reasons why i've come to this decision, but a recent live journal entry of mine really explains it all. it's not just children who make me want to be child free. it's their parents.
it's long and very ranty, but it's the way i feel at the end of every day.
i put in my notice with my employers. that was fun. i'm going to be with them til mid-april when she's scheduled to have her baby. then i'm out. no way could i handle being at home with her for her 3 month maternity leave, her 2 year old son and new baby. no fucking way. i don't get paid enough as it is. it's funny how you grow to hate people. my employers are both physicians. live in a massive, gorgeous home. they have a housekeeper, groundskeepers and me, the nanny. every week i do their towels and sheets and unload the dishwasher at least twice a week, which is probably my least favorite thing to do. i hate dishes. even if they're clean. i can't stand the sound of plates clanking, and their drinking glasses are so dry, they make a screeching noise that makes me want to cry. i hate it. anyway, they have all this outside help and neither of them can manage to wash their own sheets and towels?? bugs the shit out of me. maybe it shoudln't. but it does.
and it's tons of other little things that seem like they ought not be a part of my job. OH!! like wrapping their kid's christmas and birthday presents. my god!! AND she wants me to work on his scrapbook because she doesn't have time and says i'm more creative. doesn't have time??? she has one child. works part-time. and has, i repeat, a housekeeper, groundskeepers, and ME!!! wtf?? and wouldn't she want to do her OWN child's scrapbook. does it mean anything to her?? some parents astound me, these days. i never encountered sooo many who can't seem to take care of their families without outside help. it's making me very cynical.
i know we both have two different perspectives here. they're the parents. i'm the nanny. we're going to see things differently. my perspective is that i was hired to take care of your child when you are physically unable because of your JOB. i am not a live-in nanny. i am not a "mommy's little helper." i do not want to hang out and play with your child while you're on the phone. while you're taking a nap. while you're fixing dinner. while you're taking a shower. it's like these parents can't bear to have their children not entertained 24/7. nooooo, can't have them upset by anything. how dare parents cook dinner or make a phone call or wash the dishes or change the sheets instead of playing with their children every goddamn second. spoiled spoiled spoiled. i hate it.
when i used to babysit in high school, i would arrive at the house about 5 minutes before the parents left. they would also come home, say "thank you," pay me and let me leave. the families i keep for these days, have me come 45 min to an hour before they're ready to leave!!! they also come home and instead of "hey, let's get you out of here," it's "would you mind hanging out while i get dinner started?" or like i said, make a phone call, etc. NO!! would you want to stay late at your job?? NO!! what the hell?? i fucking hate it. i am not a family member who is comfortable just hanging out. it's business to me. go on your merry fucking way. it's just odd. and maybe my feelings sound odd to parents out there, but every nanny/babysitter i know feels the same way i do. i think it's just the way it is.
oh oh oh!! one more thing, and i'll shut up about all this. i have to write down every fucking thing this child eats. i've been doing this for over a year. breakfast. lunch. snacks. it's the same goddamn thing. it is soooo stupid!!! just ask me. how did he eat?? ugh!!
so, when did you know having children wasn't for you?
TheTimm
03-13-2006, 08:27 PM
I've always known having children wasn't for me. Even when I was a child and people would comment about someday growing up and getting married and having children, I would say I didn't want kids. And EVERYONE would say that I'd change my mind. Still haven't changed my mind. But..... if The Girl ever decides she wants me (unlikely), and decides she wants children (highly unlikely), I would.
diary of wood
03-13-2006, 09:50 PM
i majored in elem ed/english lit in college. really thought i wanted to be a teacher.
Me too, Holly. I dropped the elem ed major a year ago and will graduate this spring as an English Lit major. As a child, I always really enjoyed school. I think my initial desire to become a teacher stemmed from my love of learning. Once I began my field experiences in the classroom, however, I quickly found that teaching just wasn't a good fit for me. I never had an absolute disaster in the classroom to which I can point as the pivotal moment at which I discovered I wasn't cut out for the job. On the contrary, my professors and cooperating teachers seemed to think reasonably well of my abilities in the classroom. At the end of each day, though, I had an overwhelming sense of not feeling as though teaching was something I wanted to do on a long-term basis. At that point, I felt as though the responsible thing for me to do was to leave the education major. Kids deserve dedicated teachers; I owe it to myself not to become trapped in a career I don't really want.
As for having children of my own, I don't think I've ever wanted that for myself. When I was 12 or so, I remember pondering the subject and thinking to myself, "Wow, not ever wanting to have kids must make me kinda weird. I guess when I get older maybe I will." If anything, my desire to be childfree has intensified since then. Pregnancy scares the fucking shit out of me. I feel squeamish when I think of a living thing growing inside me for nine months. I'm not sure if I'll ever be psychologically prepared to deal with that. It's weird, though, because I can look at other pregnant women and be happy for them and not at all freaked out. When my sister-in-law was pregnant with my niece, I was totally excited for her. It's just the thought of myself in that situation which makes me feel ill.
Aside from my pregnancy-phobia, I have to say that looking at my own parents also makes me not want to have children. They've sacrificed so much of themselves over the years in order to give my brother and I a good start in the world, and I feel as though they've probably lost some of who they once were somewhere in the process. I've realized that my parents have had very few opportunities to socialize with other adults beyond their co-workers through the years. Aside from each other, they literally have no friends. Now that my brother and I are adults, they both seem kind of lost. He and I are no longer present to fill a substantial amount of their time, and I guess it's been so long since they've been free to do non-child-related things that they don't seem quite sure what to do. All I know is that whenever I see them, they seem so bored and isolated.
I know that there are many parents who successfully manage to find time to pursue their own interests and socialize with people other than family members or the people they inevitably come into contact with at work, but I'd rather not have to negotiate that balance at all. I like being able to come and go as I please without having a little person in tow. I like being able to spend my money as I wish without the constant astronomical expenses of having a child. I like spending time alone with my boyfriend/future husband without being interrupted by a child's demands. I like having time to read, watch movies, go to shows, and listen to music which is not always child-appropriate. I like being free to curse in my own living space and have adult conversations without having to worry about the example I'm setting for a young child. Most of all, I guess I like the fact that I'm the only person for whom I'm completely responsible.
/ end, as this is approaching tl; dr territory. ;)
Rinky vs.4.0
03-13-2006, 10:16 PM
Forever. The first time I can remember actually thinking "I don't want to grow up to be a wife and mother," is when I was about five years old.
It's just never been a part of me to desire children. It has never appealed to me and continues not to at age 36.
I think it helped a lot as a younger person to actually have some pretty strong and positive female role models both within my own family and outside so I never felt like a freak or was told I was one for wanting something outside the husband and 2.5 kids lifescript that is supposed to appeal to women so much.
hollerskates
03-13-2006, 10:27 PM
Most of all, I guess I like the fact that I'm the only person for whom I'm completely responsible.
yes. that's a great feeling. and hell, it's hard enough being responsible for myself.
diary of wood
03-13-2006, 10:28 PM
^ Exactly! :)
Somewhere around high school. I have an extended family member who I consider my sort of CF role model. I decided early on that I liked what she had done with her life and I was going to follow the same path.
There were other influences. Growing up in an area plagued with teen pregnancies really helped me decide what I wanted out of my life, and that just wasn't it.
I completely respect people who went the route of having kids, but that's just not me, you know?
Fox in Socks
03-13-2006, 11:21 PM
i dont think i ever wanted kids. like i never liked dolls and cabbage patch (woah dating myself) and all that shit. i was more interested in science and "boy" games. and as a teenager and adult, i actually never thought i'd even get married! i just pictured being a competitive freak my whole life. its interesting though, when i mention that as a reason for not having kids, i sometimes get, "well after you have your career/finish travelling/save the world, then you should have kids". huh? so kids are what you do when you dont have anything else to do? how nice of you to think of them as a last resort. how awful.
and i dont hate kids, i hate inconsiderate parents. some people i know have some AWESOME kids, but they work hard at making their kids be awesome. its no easy task. its certainly easier to let them do whateverthefuck they want, etc. trust me, i watch supernanny ;)
holly, i worked for a doctor like your employer. except she had 3 nannies for 3 kids and was still bitching. good god! i would think that would be as easy as [pie]....
hollerskates
03-13-2006, 11:38 PM
and i dont hate kids, i hate inconsiderate parents. some people i know have some AWESOME kids, but they work hard at making their kids be awesome. its no easy task.
yeah, that's mostly what i've encountered. the not so good parents as much as the good ones. such an eye opener.
jenniferblaufrau
03-14-2006, 12:19 AM
Holly, have you read The Nanny Diaries?
Your job sounds dreadful -- yet interesting and entertaining for outsiders. ;l
hollerskates
03-14-2006, 01:06 AM
Holly, have you read The Nanny Diaries?
Your job sounds dreadful -- yet interesting and entertaining for outsiders. ;l
a friend gave me a copy of the book, but i can't bring myself to open it until i'm done with this job. i feel like it would make me angrier.
and yeah, my job is dreadful. love the kid. hate the parents. but honestly, i'm a bit responsible. i let them take advantage of me. you teach people how to treat you, right? i've learned a lot.
queensiefaerie
03-14-2006, 05:36 AM
Seeing my mom struggle with the 5 of us: around 7 or 8 years old.
And taking care of my syblings added to my choice.
It's really odd for me because I am now 26 & see A LOT of girls I use to know that have babies. SCARY!! Time moves so quickly. I think every now & then about the kid thing, but I know how hard it is to really struggle & scrape for something to eat & I wouldn't want to put someone through that. Our world is to screwed up anyway.
Sarah.
03-14-2006, 07:05 AM
Holly, your nanny experiences sound a lot like my au pair experiences. I honestly don't think kids are born bad, it's the way they're raised, and being ignored by their parents and having a new au pair every year is a pretty surefire way to muck a child's brain up, in my opinion. They don't know who to respect because they have so many adults flitting in and out of their lives telling them what to do, so they end up not respecting anyone. At the same time, I used to find it hard to feel really sorry for a 5 year old kid wearing clothes that cost more than mine and who was spitting on me in public, telling everyone around her that it was ok, because I was just her servant.
Definitely read The Nanny Diaries, I actually left it behind at one of my ex employer's houses as an unsubtle hint, and the mother emailed me saying she thought it was hilarious and couldn't believe there were people like that in the world. Erm...
Anyway. I can't ever remember wanting children. I only ever did au pair jobs because it meant I could live rent free. I think being a good parent and bringing up children requires a lot of effort and a certain type of mentality that I just don't have. I don't think my life would be any emptier for not having children in it.
Boomer #8
03-14-2006, 11:09 AM
Anyway. I can't ever remember wanting children. [...] I think being a good parent and bringing up children requires a lot of effort and a certain type of mentality that I just don't have. I don't think my life would be any emptier for not having children in it.
I think you just took the words out of my mouth.
I'm 21, I don't say NEVER, but I don't think I'd cope with it.
It's not something that I think about a lot.
I don't mind children, i.e. other people's children because I know I'll be going home, my childfree home.
I have issues, huuuge paranoic issues. I'll have to work on them before ever considering having kids.
I'm also too paranoic and pessimistic; also I've been sure that I'll end up in a mental institution by the time I turn 25, ever since I was 13. It's in my gene pool to be mentally insane at some level.
So, in other words, I don't want my kid to turn as fucked up as its mother, and I don't think I'll be able to handle that would most likely be my fault.
I think I'd be a great aunt though.
MaverickGirl
03-14-2006, 08:15 PM
I wanted kids for a long time when I was younger. I think I initially started at wanting 6 kids, but then I realized a few things. Being that I am a lesbian, it'd be an undertaking to get pregnant. I would go the artificial insemination route, which can be expensive and heartbreaking all at once if it doesn't take. I also have problems with my female stuff that would make it harder to get pregnant, per my doctor, so that was another big point for me. And, well, I'm not the most responsible or mentally stable person in the world and sometimes I can't hardly take care of myself, let alone anyone else. I could never live with myself if anything happened to the child because of my issues and whatnot.
There are still times where I get all "Oh, look at this adorable onesie! I want a baby!" but then I think about it and realize that if it means that much to me, I'll buy the onesie and give it to one of my friends who has kids.
Did I verge on tl; dr? LOL :)
nirak
03-14-2006, 08:44 PM
I've never really wanted kids. I feel really, really lucky to have grown up in a family and society where I never considered that having kids was the only option.
When I first met my husband, and we had the kid discussion (this was while he and I were both dating someone else, just conversation) he said of course he wanted kids. Later, when we were both single, I brought it up again- because I knew it wouldn't work if he still wanted kids. He said he didn't. I asked what had changed, and he said he had just never considered the possibility that one could choose to not have children. (I guess his ex talked abotu kids a lot.)
I am soooo glad I live in a place and time where I CAN make this choice, though. There may be some discrimination, but at least I have the means and the options to not have children. Used to be, you had only one choice: nun.
jenniferblaufrau
03-14-2006, 09:09 PM
I'm as yet undecided, and the main reason is that I love my life the way it is. I love my freedom, and I am very very very protective of that. I think the only way I will have kids is if I am financially stable and well-enough-accomplished in my personal goals that I feel kids would be a welcome addition, and not a burden. Certain things that I want need to be in place first.
Nancy
03-14-2006, 10:02 PM
I've never wanted children. I love the way some children think, I read children's books, I enjoy talking to children -- but I always thought that having kids would require sacrifices from me that I'm too selfish to make. I don't need a mini-me. I care for my father and for my husband and for my cat. My stepdaughter lives with her mother in the mountains, about 5 hours' drive from here. We love each other to pieces but we have a big-sister/little sister kind of friendship. I find it difficult to understand why so many of the women I went to school with made a big to-do out of being concerned about overpopulation and vowed to never add to the problem, then began having sprogs as soon as they got out of college. My two dearest friends from way back in the days when dinosaurs roamed the earth have never had children, though they're both in long-standing relationships. We definitely have a special bond because we have this in common.
Froglover
03-15-2006, 08:53 AM
I am 40 now and have never wanted chidren. I wasn't born with a 'biological clock' and I'm not maternal. [post56] My husband doesn't want children either. He already has a daughter with his ex-wife, who pressured him into having a child because she wanted one.
My husband and I are selfish (for want of a better word) in that we want our lives for ourselves, to do whatever we want to, when we want to, without having to devote ourselves to children for 18 or more years. It's too much stress and worry and responsibility in this big bad world we live in.
I was not put here to add more people to the world. And I don't want to put my body through the whole pregnancy/painful birth thing [post64] (makes me nauseous just thinking about it). I don't need a child to love, or to love me, or to look after me when I'm old, or to carry on the family name, or whatever other reasons people have kids. I would much rather have pets.
Being an only child I am quite used to being by myself. I certainly don't want to live my life in a house full of people.
Maybe I have been partly influenced by my family situation. My mother and stepdad never wanted any more children.
It's nice to be around other people's babies and kids for a SHORT while, but that's enough and then I want to hand 'em back over to the parents quick!
Give me kittens and I'm more than happy. [cat]
There are about 100,000 reasons I don't want kids, but here are a couple-
1. I like my freedom, I like having loud sex whenever I want, I like sleeping, I like going out, and I especially like not fucking up another human being.
2. I feel like having my own biological child would be unfair to the poor kid. Who needs another clinically depressed, chubby, doughy albino nerd getting pushed off the slide in this world? My husband and I would have this child, who would be on a Zoloft drop from the day it was born and...no.
3. I think about adopting, but then I remember that adopting does not make a kid any less of a pain in the ass. In fact, it may even be moreso because they are adjusting to a new place and it's $$$$$$$$$$$ to adopt a newborn and fuck it up yourself. No thanks.
That said, I think the moment I knew I didn't want kids was when I was about 13 and my cousins were all going haywire. The 5 year old twins exploded a 2 liter bottle of soda everywhere and were fingerpainting with mayonnaise in the living room, the baby was crying non-stop, the other two were fighting, and my little brother was about 9 and was acting like a prize asshole. Since I was always the designated baby sitter, I had to deal with a lot of this. I remember thinking "I never want to go through this. Ever".
The other moment I knew I didn't want kids was when my ex boyfriend and I were having the fight over where I was going to college. I said, "I'm going to NYC." He said, "Like hell you are". I said, "What do you want?" He said, "Stay here, we'll get married and have kids." I said, "WTF?" He said, "I want a wife and five kids."
I thought about this, and realized I wanted the exact opposite.
I like having loud sex whenever I want
;v A girl after my own heart. [heart]
;v A girl after my own heart. [heart]
Well, I mean...when I'm having hot sex, last thing I want to think about is whether I'm going to traumatize my child for life. I mean, I heard my parents having sex once when I was younger by accident and was in therapy for a year. ;l
Also- and I said this in another thread and got jumped all over but NOT HERE with Rinky and Morgan in my corner- I am convinced, convinced, CONVINCED that having a kid changes your sex life. And not for the better from what I'm been reading. I am not willing to alter that part of my life, cause it's that good. Sorry. Not gonna happen. It's not the main reason I don't want kids, but its a deterring factor.
Boomer #8
03-15-2006, 12:16 PM
I saw my parents having sex when I was 3. I can tell you I'll never forget it, and it's been the most traumatizing thing ever. And I also think it ruined porn for me. However, having sex IS goooooooood.
I don't think it was so much that nobody agreed with you in the thread you got jumped on, it was just that you said it in such an asshole-ish way.
I wonder how many fathers are completely turned off sex, at least temporarily, after viewing the birth of their child? Is there a correlation between the fact that people are having smaller families and the number of fathers in the actual birthing room?
I'm sure parents can have satisfying sex lives, you don't need to be a bansheei in the bedroom to be having hot sex. That said, I still prefer the spontaneity and privacy that I have now.
I don't think it was so much that nobody agreed with you in the thread you got jumped on, it was just that you said it in such an asshole-ish way.
I wonder how many fathers are completely turned off sex, at least temporarily, after viewing the birth of their child? Is there a correlation between the fact that people are having smaller families and the number of fathers in the actual birthing room?
I'm sure parents can have satisfying sex lives, you don't need to be a bansheei in the bedroom to be having hot sex. That said, I still prefer the spontaneity and privacy that I have now.
Well, my initial statement was a joke, as it were, which I attempted to explain and it went ugly after that. But no need to rehash that whole thing- I did defend myself a little strongly admittedly, but my views on that subject stay as they are despite how asshole-ish they may be.
I also wonder about the men being turned off sex after seeing birth. I think that there was something to be said about dad's sitting in the waiting room, despite how 1950's that may be. I mean, I get turned off sex if I see childbirth on TV! Mostly cause I know that sex can result in such a thing.
And no, you don't have to be a bansheei in the bedroom, though even soft moans can be heard through walls, and bed squeaking, etc. I'm sure my parents were making an effort to be super quiet and I heard it anyway. I also wouldn't want to be interrupted mid-coitus, cause such things make me crabby.
penumbra
03-15-2006, 01:20 PM
I've always known that I didn't like kids, but it took me a while to realize that that dislike wouldn't be going away anytime soon. And funny thing is, I'm a fantastic babysitter and all my friends agree that I'd be a phenomenal mom. The reason I don't want kids?
In a way, I already have one. My older brother by 5 years is severely autistic *and* retarded *and* in poor health, requiring of 24/7 care. I have to feed him, bathe him, diaper him, with all the responsibilities of a child without the possibility of him growing out of it. My parents do most of the care for him *now*, but I know I have a decade at best before they're too old for it, and he comes into my responsibility.
So no, I don't want kids. I think having my beloved-but-highly-dependent brother in combination with a household to run, a job (for I wish to keep my job), and a baby would REALLY REALLY do me in.
Gone to Earth
03-15-2006, 05:48 PM
Forever. The first time I can remember actually thinking "I don't want to grow up to be a wife and mother," is when I was about five years old.
Me too. At 5, I told my parents that I wouldn't ever have kids and I never wanted to get married. I also told her I would live in England but I could never make that one happen.
Master Shaman
03-15-2006, 06:01 PM
I wonder how many fathers are completely turned off sex, at least temporarily, after viewing the birth of their child? Is there a correlation between the fact that people are having smaller families and the number of fathers in the actual birthing room?
Dads should NEVER be in the birthing room. I've seen births and let me tell you, it's a pretty fucking scary thing if you are not fully aware of everything that happens there, and even so it's not a pretty sight. There's the episiotomy, there's all the bleeding, there's the vag-stretching, the placenta, the screams of the mother - there's no need for anyone except for the medical staff/midwives to witness that.
Don't get me started on idiotic fathers who actually fucking TAPE the birth. Who the fuck wants to see him/herself stretching out his/her mother's twat, then leaving her in a puddle of blood? I'd be fucking traumatized if I saw that.
I love the policy that we have here. Fathers aren't allowed in the delivery room; they're not even at the hospital when the woman gives birth. After she does, someone calls them on the phone and lets them know what happened.
I was freaked out by the birth that I saw, I definitely looked at the mother differently from there on. She had a bad reaction to the epidural and there was puke and blood and gore everywhere.
I don't understand the women who basically have another baby shower as they're giving birth. In the U.S. and Canada there are a lot of birthing suites with a living room set up so the mother does everything in one room and everyone she knows can watch. I know of women who take 4 people with them to every doctor's appointment.
Gone to Earth
03-15-2006, 06:10 PM
I know of women who take 4 people with them to every doctor's appointment.
My friend's family works that way. When her aunt had both babies, like 10 people went to the hospital with them (not to mention all the appointments). When my friend had hers, same thing. I don't get it. *I* wouldn't want to be there, and on the other side if I were giving birth, I wouldn't want anyone else to be there.
I don't understand the women who basically have another baby shower as they're giving birth. In the U.S. and Canada there are a lot of birthing suites with a living room set up so the mother does everything in one room and everyone she knows can watch. I know of women who take 4 people with them to every doctor's appointment.
I saw a TLC show where a CHILD WAS WATCHING. The mother is in a bathtub, screaming and bleeding and they're talking about removing fecal matter from the water and this 5 year old kid is watching this! I was horrified.
iciclespark
03-16-2006, 11:51 AM
When I was younger, I was reluctant to marry, and children? I remember thinking in my early teens that I never wanted to give birth. I'm terrified of hospitals, which likely played a role in my declaring "If I ever want kids, I'll adopt them."
In my early teens, that changed to "adopt a ten year-old because little kids are annoying and too much effort and work". Then my mother had my sister when I was 13, and I became the default baby-sitter/beck and call nanny. And while I was very, very good at caring for children, I realized rather quickly how much I didn't want this sort of thing in my life at all. By 16 or so, I'd say I was certain, except a nagging "What's wrong with you?" that lingered for a few years due to various bingo comments that I seriously debated and eventually worked through. I came to a point where I accepted I was different and that was just fine by me.
iciclespark
03-16-2006, 11:54 AM
There are about 100,000 reasons I don't want kids, but here are a couple-
1. I like my freedom, I like having loud sex whenever I want, I like sleeping, I like going out, and I especially like not fucking up another human being.
2. I feel like having my own biological child would be unfair to the poor kid. Who needs another clinically depressed, chubby, doughy albino nerd getting pushed off the slide in this world? My husband and I would have this child, who would be on a Zoloft drop from the day it was born and...no.
3. I think about adopting, but then I remember that adopting does not make a kid any less of a pain in the ass. In fact, it may even be moreso because they are adjusting to a new place and it's $$$$$$$$$$$ to adopt a newborn and fuck it up yourself. No thanks..
Add in "Once I'm a clinical psychologist, I will scarce have time to parent anyway and I don't believe in popping kids out to stick them with a nanny or in daycare from age 1 because that's not fair to the child" and "I have my mother's impatient bitchy temper and I didn't enjoy it, so no thanks", and you have me. Only my kid would hav chronic stomach issues, OCD, bipolar tendencies.....
hollerskates
03-16-2006, 01:59 PM
I saw a TLC show where a CHILD WAS WATCHING. The mother is in a bathtub, screaming and bleeding and they're talking about removing fecal matter from the water and this 5 year old kid is watching this! I was horrified.
wait. whoa. did she happen to tell said child that mommy was going to roar like a lion?? and then she was pissed when there were complications and had to go to the hospital?
i saw it.
:m
wait. whoa. did she happen to tell said child that mommy was going to roar like a lion?? and then she was pissed when there were complications and had to go to the hospital?
i saw it.
:m
YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Plus I watched the 16 kids woman. Don't get me started on that.
Rinky vs.4.0
03-16-2006, 02:13 PM
I saw a TLC show where a CHILD WAS WATCHING. The mother is in a bathtub, screaming and bleeding and they're talking about removing fecal matter from the water and this 5 year old kid is watching this! I was horrified.
I was once unfortunate enough to click on a OMGLOOKATTHISTRAINWRECK link to a website which featured some woman detailing her entire birth experience, with her two small kids in attendance. The kids had that deer-in-the-headlights glazed expression as they gazed at her sweaty, naked and obese form and her distended, bloody vagina. The last in the series of increasingly CPS-worthy pictures featured Ms. Exhibitionist naked in a pool of blood and gore and her own faeces, breastfeeding her new baby and with what looked like a five year old kid latched on the other tit.
I mean, if you absoltely have to have your kids stare at your cunt as you piss, crap and shriek your way through childbirth, that's your affair, and that of your children's therapist later on in life. But why the FUCK do people think the world is a better place for photographing the ghastly scenes and pasting them all over the fucking internet? What exactly do they get out of that?
hollerskates
03-16-2006, 02:23 PM
but it's a miracle, don't you know????
;)
Rinky vs.4.0
03-16-2006, 02:33 PM
but it's a miracle, don't you know????
;)
That's another of my pet peeves. The miracle of birth? It's a basic biological function that happens thousands of times a day. These people need to buy a bloody dictionary.
The last in the series of increasingly CPS-worthy pictures featured Ms. Exhibitionist naked in a pool of blood and gore and her own faeces, breastfeeding her new baby and with what looked like a five year old kid latched on the other tit.
?
I almost cried reading that. For real. UGHOMGWTF????!@!!111
People are seriously fucked in the head. For real.
My favorite was when I saw a site where the women decided to EAT THEIR OWN GOD DAMN PLACENTA!! But only after making a painting with it. :m
iciclespark
03-16-2006, 03:34 PM
I'm so having placenta-eating nightmares now. This thread bes triggering, yo.
Boomer #8
03-16-2006, 07:56 PM
Rinky... I'll never eat again.
i think eating a placenta sounds kind of cool actually.
there was this amazing special on the History Channel about cannabalism. basically some have it in their genes to eat humans without getting sick (kuru), while others don't. or something like that.
edit: uhh, wow tangent much?
Alejandroooo!
03-16-2006, 08:24 PM
I almost cried reading that. For real. UGHOMGWTF????!@!!111
People are seriously fucked in the head. For real.
My favorite was when I saw a site where the women decided to EAT THEIR OWN GOD DAMN PLACENTA!! But only after making a painting with it. :m
I always wonder how people prepare the placenta. Placenta burger? Placenta kebab? Placenta steak and chips? I guess a lot of animals eat their placentas though, and it's supposedly good for helping the mother recover, but...painting with it? FTW??
I don't know if Sacla is a brand in the US as well as here, but at least the Brits'll get it - I swear when Kari mentioned placenta painting I imagined the Sacla ad with the guy throwing paints at the wall and then it zooms out and it's a painting of a jar of Sacla. Except he was throwing placentas at the wall. "Ciao, ragazzi!"
Including this one, there are 9 placentas in this post. Joy.
hollerskates
03-16-2006, 08:27 PM
didn't cindy crawford bury hers?
.....People are seriously fucked in the head. For real.
My favorite was when I saw a site where the women decided to EAT THEIR OWN GOD DAMN PLACENTA!! But only after making a painting with it. :m
I've been reading this thread with interest on peoples views and opinions and then I got to this one. I gotta go and throw up now. Adios....
...and I was going to order pizza tonight.
how fucked up do you have to be to eat a placenta? and what would you serve with it? used tampons.
I was once unfortunate enough to click on a OMGLOOKATTHISTRAINWRECK link to a website which featured some woman detailing her entire birth experience, with her two small kids in attendance. The kids had that deer-in-the-headlights glazed expression as they gazed at her sweaty, naked and obese form and her distended, bloody vagina. The last in the series of increasingly CPS-worthy pictures featured Ms. Exhibitionist naked in a pool of blood and gore and her own faeces, breastfeeding her new baby and with what looked like a five year old kid latched on the other tit.
I mean, if you absoltely have to have your kids stare at your cunt as you piss, crap and shriek your way through childbirth, that's your affair, and that of your children's therapist later on in life. But why the FUCK do people think the world is a better place for photographing the ghastly scenes and pasting them all over the fucking internet? What exactly do they get out of that?
That was the crunchy hippie mom site, right? She's got enormous dreadlocks and lots of tattoos or something and she's pulling the baby out with her bare hands on the living room floor in front of everyone?
I accidentally clicked a site like that once and nearly vomited. That's primarily why I don't click links around here anymore.
Hippie mom....ha ha....that's funny. I loved the 60's.........sort of.
nirak
03-17-2006, 12:45 AM
I actually am not grossed out int he least by the thought of eating (my own) placenta. Not that it's ever happen, or that I would go to the effort to save it, but it doesn't make me go "ew" or anything.
I saw something once about a woman that saved the umbilical cord. WTF???
^ I think there's actually a medical benefit to that - saving and storing the cord, that is. Cord blood is excellent for treating certain illnesses.
Did you mean she saved it for some other reason?
nirak
03-17-2006, 01:08 AM
I dunno. It was in a jar in liquid, and it was all bloated. I assume for the medical benefits you have to freeze it?
I don't know if she put it on her shelf or what.
edit- maybe she heard it was good to save it, and misunderstood the HOW of it. hahahaha
I can see it all now.....Friday morning before heading to work pull a frozen placenta out of the freezer to unthaw for dinner that evening. Why not invite some guests over....after all placenta goes a long ways. Chardonnay or Cabernet? Decisions decisions........
Placenta, taco, really what's the difference?
And I'd go with a robust Cabernet. Something that could really stand up to the gaminess of the placenta. :)
Can you BBQ placenta? BBQ season is coming up. Nothing like a bonfire on the beach...good friends...good drink.....placenta and corn on the cob....god damn ....
kind of like a clam bake, only more like a fish taco!
I so want to post a picture of a placenta. Maybe I can have Master Shaman draw me his interpretation of one.
^ With a Caesar salad......
Snort, Caesar(ean) salad. I get it.
*whips up some egg salad to go with it.*
hollerskates
03-17-2006, 11:37 AM
my thread smells.
:(
It won't smell after it cooks....
hollerskates
03-17-2006, 11:46 AM
*passes out vick's vapo rub for upper lip*
^I blame Tad. He's a bad influence.
SMMY's my hero....I learned to be this way from her.
six50eight
03-19-2006, 01:16 PM
#1 reason for not having children: pushing 8 pounds of baby through my vag. It's just not going to happen.
Once in a while I'll get a maternal inkling, but I just can't get past the fear of childbirth. I watched the videos in health class, I know what goes on. And what if the baby isn't comming out and you have to have a c-section or an epesiotomy?! Fuck that shit.
Besides childbirth, raising a child is one of the most difficult things to do in life and I'm not sure I'm up for the challenge.
hollerskates
03-19-2006, 02:03 PM
^^ha. yeah, i don't think i'm ok with the actual delivering of the baby either. i just don't know if it's worth it. the idea of laying it all out there...i wouldn't say i'm scared of hospitals, but one of my fears is not being able to take care of myself. and the idea of being in a hospital and something going wrong and people coming in and out staring at me like i'm on display. i mean i know that can happen and probably will happen to me at some point with cancer and other lovely things, but i dread it, and if i can help it i'm not going to knowingly put myself in that situation.
Fuck delivery- being pregnant ALONE scares me. Vomiting, weight gain, stretch marks...no thanks!
frangipanigrrl
03-19-2006, 03:10 PM
Fuck delivery- being pregnant ALONE scares me. Vomiting, weight gain, stretch marks...no thanks!
That's where I am....not one thing about pregnancy, delivery or parenting sounds good to me. I'm a really queasy person and pregnancy completely grosses me out. My 2 best friends have gone through 3 pregnancies between them in the last 3 years and I have seen and heard about things I still have nightmares about. I come close to passing out at the thought of a baby kicking. There's NO way I could handle it. I'd be unconscious from the minute I found out I was pregnant. I just don't have the stomach for any part of it. Yikes!
The having a kid part (even through adoption which eliminates the gross pregnancy stuff) doesn't appeal to me either. I see my friends with kids (we're all about 30) and it's like they're trapped in a way that I couldn't handle. They need to make plans for a simple dinner date or night out like 3 weeks ahead of time so they can arranged child care. Then, sometimes the child care falls through on occasion and they can't go out for like another couple of weeks. I'm actually quite a homebody myself, but my partner and I seem to NEED spontanaeity weekly. Like sometimes we'll decide to go for a romantic dinner at 8:00 on a Friday night or take off with friends somewhere. These things can't always be planned like weeks or even days in advance. Recently we had a beautiful vacation in Mexico. If we had kids, we couldn't go because we'd have no one to babysit for like 8 days. We thrive on this freedom and we've been doing things this way for over 12 years and don't ever want to give it up.
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