Need Help With 4 Year Old

[tbrown]

I HAD A PARENT IN MY DAYCARE THAT IS DRIVING ME NUTS AND SO IT HAS CAME TO THESE EXTREMES PLEASE HELP[pan]
I need your help in research I am doing about 4 year olds. Please
help me if you can I am about to lose my mind. Here is the situation
I have a problem that I need to get a majority answer to so that I
can prove that this is or is not normal for the situation.

1. Your 4 year old is questioned 16 days after an incident occurs. Do
you honestly think that the child remembers all details of the event?

2. If a 4 year old has ADHD do you believe that they know the
difference between reality and fiction.

3. Do you believe that a 4 year old has a tendancey to make up
stories?

4. Do you think that if a 4 year old hears something from their
parents enough that they will repeat and believe what they have heard?

5. When the parent themselves says that a child makes up stories how
do you pick out what is true and what is not?

6. If a 4 year old can look you in the eye and lie to you and you
know he is lying because you witnessed what you are asking him about
how do you know when he is telling you the truth?

7. If your child is on (or had been on) medication for ADHD do you
have a problem with them not wanting to sleep at night? What
medication causes this problem?

8. Do you have problems with your 4 year old or your ADHD child being
the nicest, sweetest child one minute and then the child of the
devils spawn the next?

9. What causes an ADHD child or 4 year old to be combative or violent?

10. What causes an ADHD child or 4 year old to become obsessed with
boobs and butts?

[courey]

I don't think anyone's going to be able to help you decide what's normal or not normal for your particular situation, since every child is different and will behave differently in various situations. Even having a "majority answer" isn't going to mean anything.

Some of your questions about ADHD can easily be answered by searching google, and some of your questions couldn't be answered by a parent with ADHD themselves. Also, I have never heard of a four year old being medicated for ADHD; most physicians will not agree to medicate a child under 6 for behavior problems. *In fact, most physicians won't even diagnose a 4 year old as having ADHD.

[Churumbela]

I'm adressing these questions as a childcare professional. However, if you do in fact work in a daycare as you claim, you really should know the answers...

1. No, I would never expect a four year old to remember something which occurred over two weeks before.
2. Four year olds are VERY rarely diagnosed with ADHD.
3. Many pre-K children make up stories. It is completely normal.
4. Children are extremely impressionable. Yes, they will believe things they hear repeatedly.
5. You have to judge the situation yourself. Generally, parents have their children's best interests at heart.
6. Lying and telling the truth is not that subjective with young children. It is rare that a child that age will "lie" with the express purpose of deceiving you.
7. A four year old should NEVER be on meds for ADHD. I don't care what your doctor says.
8. Welcome to life with four year olds. Totally and completely normal.
9. This is true of all four year olds. Their minds are working overtime, and sometimes they have issues making themselves understood. This can be extremely frustrating, and they can lash out.
10. Four year olds humor level is such that bodily functions are hilarious. Farting, breasts, bottoms, it's all joke fodder for preK kids. They grow out of it. Don't react.

[NightRose]

I'm adressing these questions as a childcare professional. However, if you do in fact work in a daycare as you claim, you really should know the answers...

1. No, I would never expect a four year old to remember something which occurred over two weeks before.
2. Four year olds are VERY rarely diagnosed with ADHD.
3. Many pre-K children make up stories. It is completely normal.
4. Children are extremely impressionable. Yes, they will believe things they hear repeatedly.
5. You have to judge the situation yourself. Generally, parents have their children's best interests at heart.
6. Lying and telling the truth is not that subjective with young children. It is rare that a child that age will "lie" with the express purpose of deceiving you.
7. A four year old should NEVER be on meds for ADHD. I don't care what your doctor says.
8. Welcome to life with four year olds. Totally and completely normal.
9. This is true of all four year olds. Their minds are working overtime, and sometimes they have issues making themselves understood. This can be extremely frustrating, and they can lash out.
10. Four year olds humor level is such that bodily functions are hilarious. Farting, breats, bottoms, it's all joke fodder for preK kids. They grow out of it. Don't react.


I agree.

[bellegurl]

I'm not a child care professional, but I am a parent. I have found, in my experience, that any behaviour issues should be discussed right after the incident has occurred--not only with a 4 year-old, but with an 11 year-old--at least, if he is anything like my 11 year-old!!

Also, since there are so many adults out there who have trouble distinguishing between reality and fiction, who are we to lay that responsibility on our children, and just assume that they can do so?

Since I do not have enough knowledge about ADHD, I won't answer the question, but I agree with Churumbela's answer.

Hope this helps!

[Ryoko!]

I'm adressing these questions as a childcare professional. However, if you do in fact work in a daycare as you claim, you really should know the answers...

1. No, I would never expect a four year old to remember something which occurred over two weeks before.
2. Four year olds are VERY rarely diagnosed with ADHD.
3. Many pre-K children make up stories. It is completely normal.
4. Children are extremely impressionable. Yes, they will believe things they hear repeatedly.
5. You have to judge the situation yourself. Generally, parents have their children's best interests at heart.
6. Lying and telling the truth is not that subjective with young children. It is rare that a child that age will "lie" with the express purpose of deceiving you.
7. A four year old should NEVER be on meds for ADHD. I don't care what your doctor says.
8. Welcome to life with four year olds. Totally and completely normal.
9. This is true of all four year olds. Their minds are working overtime, and sometimes they have issues making themselves understood. This can be extremely frustrating, and they can lash out.
10. Four year olds humor level is such that bodily functions are hilarious. Farting, breasts, bottoms, it's all joke fodder for preK kids. They grow out of it. Don't react.

I started early childhood ed. as an elective in high school, this was one of the first things they taught us. A child around this age (or younger) will tell you whatever they think you want to hear, wether it's the truth or not, or wether it's what you want to hear or not. They don't grasp the concept of lying...they pretty much live in their world, and it's up the people around them to fill that world with love, bounderies, and knowlage.

Keep in mind, that there is so much development at this age! A human being grows more from the day of birth to around 4-5 years old than at any other stage in their life. To diagnose a child of this age with ADHD would be a bit premature, behavioral problems are more learned and observed from this age group than any other. However, development can come at different stages for different kids, even if their enviroments are somewhat similar.

Hang out with a four year old and you'll hear all kinds of cool stories. Pretend play and imagination rule their world. We could learn a thing or two from them...